There are a number of clues, warnings really, that hint at the quality of a product, and should be noted before you even bother taking it off the shelf.
The first is straight out of Spaceballs. If said product bears the label; “[popular franchise] the [product]”, then stay away from it at all costs. [popular franchise] The Video Game was thrown together in 3 months and plays like a turd, while [popular franchise] The Chocolate bar tastes of equal quality. They ooze cheapness from every pore and reek the foul stench of greedy marketing groups (a scent that seems a cross between rotting fruit and public toilets).
Hype is the second warning as to the shoddy quality of a product, especially when said product is either a film or a game. More often than not, if something bares the words ‘Critically acclaimed’, you should treat it as toxic and not go near it (or, at the very least, be prepared to vomit uncontrollably or break out in a rash if you DO choose to ingest).
On its release, ‘The Blair witch Project’ was hailed as the scariest film of all time. When I first watched it, I was expecting to see something so terrifying, so utterly horrific that I’d either leave an irremovable stain on the seat or collapse in a fearful, gibbering heap….or both. An hour and a bit later and all I’d seen was a lot of shaky footage, twigs and a retard that films herself washing her hands.
‘Halo’ has been called “genre defining” and “the greatest game ever made” since its release. I’d not played it when it first appeared as I couldn’t get planning permission to install an Xbox in my home, but, in the last week I finally got ‘round to giving the king of console shooters a blast. What did I get for 8 hours play? A cliché story (evil aliens that take control of and mutate a host? Oh, no, THAT’s never been done before), levels so bland and repetitive that little glowing arrows had to be placed on the floor to prevent you from unwittingly going round and round in circles and then; back tracking. Lots and lots of backtracking.
And what the hell was that obstacle course at the end of the game all about?! How much more out of place could that actually be? They couldn’t disguise it to make it look just a little bit like it BELONGED on an intergalactic battleship?!
‘Halo 2’ is said by reviewers not to be as good as the original.
I think I’ll give it a miss.
Hype leads to disappointment. What you get in the end is never what you hoped for. Never waste time on something that has been built up and up. Always go on reputation as that’s EARNED, not fabricated.